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Femdom shock submissive

Nude college girls on couch. In Kama Latvia. Best Bikini Models. Married mature big tits wife. Subaru birmingham al. Medical conditions itching clitoris. Lesbo marital-device. Riding big white dick. Submitted by Dumb Domme Source 28, The reader should take note that these findings are not intended Femdom shock submissive represent every submissive male or article source situation. Ultimately, it is my hope the findings of this case study will contribute much to our larger understanding of the submissive male. The subject, a male submissive Femdom shock submissive his late 30s, was observed in a variety of communication situations in a number of virtual and material environments. While I observed some variance in the stages and Femdom shock submissive degree of recursiveness in his passage through the phases, the findings below represent the typical progression. Ironically, since the subsequent phase is nearly always self-flagellation, this particular phase serves Femdom shock submissive meaningful purpose. During this secondary phrase, the submissive engages in a sort of self-punishment as demonstrated by statements such as:. It is interesting to note that self-flagellation may be counterproductive and ultimately detrimental to the submissive male, as the female dominant wants to flagellate him herself. As such, the purpose of this phase is unclear. In the tertiary stage, the Femdom shock submissive submissive is observed making mountains out of mole hills. Deny sex femdom stories Zadar Dasty Sax.

Teen hairy pussy fuck. But it came from a real response to the way my submissive handled himself Femdom shock submissive he made a mistake. His response felt self-centered and selfish to me. We talked about it, of course, but after I noticed patterns, I was angry enough to rant about it in writing I was so angry I never Femdom shock submissive it in its original formand Femdom shock submissive rant evolved into this satire is it satire?

The protocol one was too close to home for me! Ingrained habit now. Learn more here is that too self-serving? Your Comment. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email. Stage 1: I know better than this. This is so unlike me! I deserve worse than that. I fucked up and I know it hurt your feelings. Is there anything I can do to make it up to you? Case Study: October 13th, by Dumb Domme.

Dumb Domme: Hedone says: June Femdom shock submissive, at 2: Anonymous says: July 1, at 6: July 5, at Peroxide says: June 28, at 4: June 28, at 8: June 28, at 9: June 28, at June 29, at 4: Heather Cole says: June 30, at 9: July 1, at 3: July 31, at 5: July 31, at The Femdom shock submissive thing can be done with a submissive. The scientist rang a bell each time he fed the dog. This is known as a conditioned response.

The really simple translation to kink is that if a particular toy is regularly used in conjunction with sexual pleasure, then the site or feel of that toy will eventually start to Femdom shock submissive a sexual arousal response, even if it is not a sexual toy.

I know people who become aroused at the smell of rubbing alcohol because they associate it with play piercing and Femdom shock submissive hot click sex that comes during or after the scene.

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These physical conditioned responses can be used in a lot of ways. The really simple one is to simply speed things up. A Femdom shock submissive sexual response can reduce the time needed to get someone ready for sex. Or can be used to tease and torment them in public.

A negative association can also be used in place of punishment in Femdom shock submissive public place. A finger snap that is usually associated with a negative sensation can get the attention of the submissive quickly and effectively and let them know they are in trouble. Any and all senses can be used for this. Smell, touch, taste, sight, and sound.

The more the senses are combined and intertwined, the more effective Femdom shock submissive will be. When possible, you want the stimulus to be something they rarely encounter in day to day life. Basically, you want as much control over the stimulus as possible. You want to be the only one, or practically the only one, that provides Femdom shock submissive stimulus. If you are trying to link a trigger word to their orgasm, it better not be a word they are hearing regularly each day, or it will never work.

OK, now for operant conditioning BF Skinner s. This is what most people think of when you talk about training a submissive. It is rewards and punishments. Or, more accurately, it is everything that a dominant does which either encourages or discourages certain behaviors of the submissive, whether intentional or not. This here your body language, your facial expressions, the words you use when you talk to them, if you use their real name or your pet name for them, whether you look at them while you talk, and pretty much every other thing you ever do, ever.

Like I said in the beginning, we all condition each other constantly. If you have a friend that is your first call on a bad day, it is because that person has trained you to expect a good result from making that choice while Femdom shock submissive have trained you to have lower expectations of them. On a societal level, etiquette is trained into us early on. It can be subtle, subconscious, and totally unnoticed, even by the person doing it.

But it is real and it is happening in every second of every day. How many of you have been to Thunder in the Mountains or any other large sort of Femdom shock submissive or conference. Femdom shock submissive, so you go to get your badge, you all go to the desk that has the first letter of your name on it. Click at this page one has to tell you to do that.

You just know that it is expected of you. And Femdom shock submissive you want to effectively train anyone, whether it is your dom, your sub, or your friends. Femdom shock submissive

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Consistent actions which let them know what is expected of them and what they can Femdom shock submissive from you is the way to do it. And you never have to say a single thing out loud about it. Effective training can be here without ever having to give explicit Femdom shock submissive or direction. Providing a positive stimulus or other positive stimulus in response to a desired behavior.

Sexhuis duitsland Watch Video Porn Adlester. It is a joy to read, really, so thank you for giving the Internet a little view into an intimate piece of your life. Thank you so much for the comment! But it came from a real response to the way my submissive handled himself when he made a mistake. His response felt self-centered and selfish to me. We talked about it, of course, but after I noticed patterns, I was angry enough to rant about it in writing I was so angry I never posted it in its original form , and that rant evolved into this satire is it satire? The protocol one was too close to home for me! Ingrained habit now. Or is that too self-serving? Your Comment. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email. Stage 1: I know better than this. This is so unlike me! I deserve worse than that. I fucked up and I know it hurt your feelings. Is there anything I can do to make it up to you? Case Study: October 13th, by Dumb Domme. Dumb Domme: Hedone says: June 28, at 2: Anonymous says: July 1, at 6: July 5, at Peroxide says: June 28, at 4: June 28, at 8: June 28, at 9: June 28, at June 29, at 4: Heather Cole says: June 30, at 9: July 1, at 3: These are things that you will teach them or train them to do that are valuable beyond the reach of your particular relationship. Learning to give a kick-ass massage is not going to stop being useful when they are in service to someone else. But in the same way, you do not necessarily have to be the person to train them for these skills. Especially if you are not qualified to do so. If you want your sub to have a particular skill, like cooking or cleaning or massage or manicure, there are places you can send them where someone else will do the training for you. They are called schools. And just about all of the techniques I am going to discuss are employed by effective teachers every day. The second purpose of training is to teach things that are specific to you as the dominant. This is often the refinement of the broad skills from the first section. You can send them to yoga class to improve their flexibility, stamina, and endurance, but knowing exactly how far apart you want their knees to be when they kneel requires individualized teaching from you. These are the things that the submissive wants to learn or change and has asked for help with. It could be getting rid of a destructive bad habit or staying on track with a project that has been neglected. It could be enforcing a diet or helping them make space for a hobby that calms them. These things are often neglected but are quite possibly more important than the other two sections. To make sure that they still feel like they are getting something out of the relationship. This article is actually just one section from a larger document that we are thinking of making into a book. What fulfills them and drives their submission? Not only do these factors need to be taken into consideration before starting a relationship, and on an ongoing basis as the relationship continues, but it also has to be given proper attention when you are thinking about beginning training of some kind. A person who derives great pleasure from being in service and making others happy is not going to need to be punished very often, if at all. However, if you are not careful, you can accidently punish them a hundred times a day without knowing it. Similarly, a person may get fulfillment, not from the task itself, but from the control that task represents. This person is going to need more attention. They will occasionally misbehave with the intention of being punished. Not necessarily because they like the punishment, but because they are testing the dynamic. It is your choice whether you let it get to that point or whether you are proactive. Conditioning is a form of learning in which either 1 a given stimulus or signal becomes increasingly effective in evoking a response or 2 a response occurs with increasing regularity in a well-specified and stable environment. When you condition leather, you make it soft and comfortable to wear while fortifying it against the elements and making sure it lasts a long time. When a soldier goes through conditioning, they usually mean the physical training of the person to make their body fit for battle. But there is also a high degree of psychological conditioning that takes place, re-shaping their mind to accept and follow orders and to resist fear of death. The same thing can be done with a submissive. The scientist rang a bell each time he fed the dog. This is known as a conditioned response. The really simple translation to kink is that if a particular toy is regularly used in conjunction with sexual pleasure, then the site or feel of that toy will eventually start to elicit a sexual arousal response, even if it is not a sexual toy. I know people who become aroused at the smell of rubbing alcohol because they associate it with play piercing and the hot hot sex that comes during or after the scene. These physical conditioned responses can be used in a lot of ways. The really simple one is to simply speed things up. A well-conditioned sexual response can reduce the time needed to get someone ready for sex. Or can be used to tease and torment them in public. A negative association can also be used in place of punishment in a public place. A finger snap that is usually associated with a negative sensation can get the attention of the submissive quickly and effectively and let them know they are in trouble. Any and all senses can be used for this. Smell, touch, taste, sight, and sound. The more the senses are combined and intertwined, the more effective it will be. When possible, you want the stimulus to be something they rarely encounter in day to day life. Basically, you want as much control over the stimulus as possible. You want to be the only one, or practically the only one, that provides that stimulus. If you are trying to link a trigger word to their orgasm, it better not be a word they are hearing regularly each day, or it will never work. OK, now for operant conditioning BF Skinner s. This is what most people think of when you talk about training a submissive. It is rewards and punishments. Or, more accurately, it is everything that a dominant does which either encourages or discourages certain behaviors of the submissive, whether intentional or not. This is your body language, your facial expressions, the words you use when you talk to them, if you use their real name or your pet name for them, whether you look at them while you talk, and pretty much every other thing you ever do, ever. Like I said in the beginning, we all condition each other constantly. If you have a friend that is your first call on a bad day, it is because that person has trained you to expect a good result from making that choice while others have trained you to have lower expectations of them. On a societal level, etiquette is trained into us early on. It can be subtle, subconscious, and totally unnoticed, even by the person doing it. But it is real and it is happening in every second of every day. How many of you have been to Thunder in the Mountains or any other large sort of convention or conference. Ok, so you go to get your badge, you all go to the desk that has the first letter of your name on it. No one has to tell you to do that. You just know that it is expected of you. And if you want to effectively train anyone, whether it is your dom, your sub, or your friends. Consistent actions which let them know what is expected of them and what they can expect from you is the way to do it. And you never have to say a single thing out loud about it. Effective training can be done without ever having to give explicit instructions or direction. Providing a positive stimulus or other positive stimulus in response to a desired behavior. The submissive gets to have an orgasm if they keep the house clean. This is a pretty common term that most people are familiar with. Somebody does something you want them to do, you give em a cookie. With the right person, a smile can be cookie enough. After that when you all responded, I said cool or awesome or great. And over time, more and more responded. Easy stuff. Removing an averse stimulus in response to a desired behavior. Removing the chastity device for the evening if they correctly cook the meal you request. This can result in either direct response training Whenever they here the annoying noise, they do a specific action to make it stop or in active avoidance, where they perform the desired behavior to avoid the negative stimulus altogether. The next one, almost everyone gets wrong. It means making a bad feeling go away as a reward for good behavior. I gave a really overly simplistic example on the handout. They learn over time that when they start to smell the bad smell, they know how to make it go away. If you are really good, they get to come off early. Even if the dom never says so outloud, but simply rewards good behavior by removing them before the scheduled time, the sub will learn over time. If I am good all the time, not just Fridays, the sub has learned, than I can avoid ever having to wear the nipple clamps. Providing an averse stimulus in response to an undesired behavior. The next is another that most people are pretty familiar with and know how to use. Positive punishment is a stimulus which discourages bad behavior. We are so lazy we set this one to auto-pilot with dogs now. The collars that spray citronella when the dog barks. Or the invisible fence that gives them a little electric shock if they go past a certain point in the yard. Yeah, that kinda stuff works on people, too. There are even products made for it. And basically the device has to stay horizontal or it shocks your genitals. Effective, I imagine, though I have not tried it myself. Of course, this can be done manually as well. And the advantage of humans is that we can talk so the learning is faster. So I can tell you, if you do X, I will do Y, rather than just doing it and hoping that you pick up on it. But with some stubborn type people, the subtle administration of rewards and punishments without explicit acknowledgement can be more effective. Removing a positive stimulus in response to an undesired behavior. Finally, we have negative punishment. This one is pretty straight forward, too. No World of Warcraft for the rest of the week. No orgasms til June. Something that you like is being taken away from you, as punishment for bad behavior. Fun time over. Especially if the fun time only stops for the sub, but the dom still finishes off. Many interesting curse words can result from this. So, we should have that terminology straight now. Positive is adding something and negative is taking something away. Does that make sense to everyone? Is that clear? Because nothing else will make much sense without it. Ok, moving forward. Unless you have a lot of free time, it is simply not possible to respond either positively or negatively to every single thing that a submissive does. Ratio Schedule: The reward or punishment occurs after a specific number of occurrences of the target behavior. The first is a ratio. This means that when the reward or punishment is given out depends on the number of times that the target behavior occurs. Continuous means a 1: Every time the submissive does a particular thing, they receive the response. If something is a high priority or if something is particularly new, this is probably the schedule you want, but as I said before, it will nearly impossible to maintain this for every single behavior you are targeting. So you have to reserve this schedule for special cases. A fixed ratio says every 10 times or every 20 times you do the particular action, you will get a particular reward or punishment. This is a lower investment than a continuous schedule, but can often have the same behavioral effect. A fixed ratio schedule tends to produce a steady rate of high-frequency behavior as the submissive tries to get as many rewards as possible, as quickly as possible. Games of chance are designed to reward you just enough to keep you playing, but not too much that it becomes an expectation. In the same way, police attempt to have the bare minimum traffic enforcement to make people choose to drive safer but without committing too many resources to it. The punishment or reward is administered every time the behavior occurs. Vending Machine. The punishment or reward is administered every n th time the behavior occurs. Car wash punch card. Your 10 th wash is free! The punishment or reward is administered, on average, every n th time the behavior occurs, but not always exactly on the n th occurrence. Slot machine. But these panties are seriously different. Sign up to win a pair in your - or your lover's - size. In both cases, these submissives longed to make those life changes but felt like they couldn't because of impostor syndrome. The Dominant's order gave them the confidence to do it. Why would a Dominant give this kind of order? One Dom I know put it this way, "Yes, I'm in control, and I could take that control and use it to run my sub into the ground, but I'd rather build them up so they can be the best person they can be. Then what do you have? A broken toy. Maintenance is important. Other Dominants assist their submissives in losing weight through diet and exercise Domming. In addition to being another way for the Dominant to exercise control no pun intended, although it IS a great pun Some Dominants will put their submissives on strict diets, even spelling out the exact menu and requiring their submissives to weigh and measure all foods and track their intake in a food log. Financial domination, or FinDom, is a fetish in which one person most commonly a man gets gratification from transferring large sums to another person usually a woman. Allowing someone else to manage your finances is an act that takes a lot of trust because it opens a submissive up to potential financial abuse by an unscrupulous Dominant. Additionally, should their Dominant partner turn abusive a risk in any romantic relationship , lacking access to financial resources can make it that much more difficult to leave them. However, so long as the Dominant is more knowledgeable about money management and acts out of the best interest of the submissive, surrendering financial control can actually be very beneficial long term for the submissive if they struggle with those skills, especially if the Dominant teaches the submissive those skills so that they can eventually manage money on their own. Our voice is a big part of our identity and our autonomy. As a way of exercising control, some Doms employ speech restriction orders where a submissive isn't to speak until spoken to - or not even then, depending on the order. This speech restriction can be part of a kinky scene, of course, but can also extend outside of bedroom time to a couple's everyday existence. I knew a woman who had tried everything to stop biting her nails - sheer willpower, setting aside money for each day she resisted that she could spend on something fun. She even painted them with bitter-tasting varnish. Nothing worked. He ordered her to stop biting her nails and grow out claws to rake his back..

source The submissive gets to have an orgasm if they keep the house clean.

Femdom shock submissive is a pretty common term that most people are familiar with. Somebody does something you want them to do, you give em a cookie. With the right person, a smile can be cookie enough. Femdom shock submissive that when you all responded, I said cool or awesome or great. And over time, more and more responded.

Sex maassluis Watch Video Nice naked. The subject, a male submissive in his late 30s, was observed in a variety of communication situations in a number of virtual and material environments. While I observed some variance in the stages and some degree of recursiveness in his passage through the phases, the findings below represent the typical progression. Ironically, since the subsequent phase is nearly always self-flagellation, this particular phase serves no meaningful purpose. During this secondary phrase, the submissive engages in a sort of self-punishment as demonstrated by statements such as:. It is interesting to note that self-flagellation may be counterproductive and ultimately detrimental to the submissive male, as the female dominant wants to flagellate him herself. As such, the purpose of this phase is unclear. In the tertiary stage, the male submissive is observed making mountains out of mole hills. In cases of more serious infractions, the submissive is observed making apocalypses out of mountains. This stage is indicated by dramatic statements that inflate the seriousness of the error, and often simultaneously exaggerate the possible consequence of such action. Ironically, this type of unnecessary drama only serves to make the dominant feel worse. Such statements include:. Observation of this behavior is surprising—the submissive had never demonstrated such behavior previously, nor had the dominant ever asked the subject to practice such protocols. The reader should note that the effect on the dominant was negligible, resulting only in sarcasm: Dominant bitches love the shift key. Nothing makes a Domme feel loved, appreciated, and respected like the fucking shift key. Additionally, the subject may offer to make it up to the dominant in some meaningful way. Engagement in this phase is indicated by such statements as:. While the results are by no means conclusive, it is the hope of this researcher that future possibilities for the study of submissive sorry can be avoided entirely. I had fun writing it, even though it came out of a frustrating situation. I can see stage one, as some stalling, but also genuine shock that the sub in question had forgotten that they like the dynamic better than whatever petty reason they had for disobeying. I see stage two as being a semi subconscious attempt to mitigate the consequences they are about to encounter. But stages three and four seem preposterous to me, like putting out a house fire with your valuables. I really like your thoughts about shock—I think sometimes the hypothetical submissive does forget he prefers being owned. Actually, the events that loosely inspired this were more like putting out a votive candle with your valuables. A truly fascinating field study if ever there was one. I think the Domme the hypothetical Domme, of course! Perhaps she was unwilling or unable to punish. If she takes option 1 or 2 and continues to be disappointed, then she is to blame. Perhaps it is the submissive who is failing. After open exchange with the submissive has taken place, an understanding of what is to be expected is reached, and the behavior continues, it is then time to reevaluate the relationship. That the Domme was unable to make a grown adult choose to uphold his part in the relationship can hardly be laid at her feet as a failure. Because I will take a cane to those fingers. That question is now my gut-check question. Did I make an honest mistake? With a fixed interval, judgment for the administration of a punishment or reward only happens every so often. A great example is Christmas time with kids. Those two weeks before Christmas is the best behavior you have ever seen. If the weeks leading up to Christmas are the best behavior you ever see, the days after Christmas are the worst. But over time, there is a net overall improvement in behavior. On a variable interval, the moments of judgment are not known to the submissive. You might say that their room will be inspected three times per week, but not tell them when. This can remove that scalloping effect and see a more consistent pattern of behavior. Overall, however, the effects of this schedule are much less potent, as you can see in the graph. This can be corrected by making the punishments and rewards greater. A set amount of time must pass before a reward or punishment will be administered after the previous reward or punishment. Free coffee with purchase, limit one per customer per day. An indeterminate amount of time passes between a reward or punishment being administered, which is still conditional on behavior. Checking email. Pop quizzes. Random drug tests. The approaches are positive in nature in that we find ways to use rewards to motivate the submissive to behave better instead of punishing them for their present ways, which may have been ingrained over a period of years or decades. While punishments can be combined with these procedures to create a more powerful change program, DR procedures are often used without punishment procedures accompanying them. Used to reduce a target behavior over time to acceptable levels by rewarding improvements reduction in the behavior , even if the behavior is still present. A submissive who normally smokes 12 cigarettes a day is rewarded for each day that they only smoke After a week or two, the number is reduced to 10, then 9, and so on until the behavior is eliminated. Used to eliminate a behavior by rewarding the absence of that behavior, regardless of what other behaviors are present. This is particularly useful for frequent, severe, and repetitive behaviors. Since rewards are given, even for different undesirable behavior, it should only be used for the elimination of high-priority problem behaviors. A submissive with a habit of calling people by their legal names at public events. The submissive is rewarded for each event where this does not happen, even if the other names they call them are not necessarily appropriate or polite. It will generally take a little while to see the initial benefit of this technique, but once it takes effect, the behavior will reduce drastically and quickly. Not because you the dom prefers that position, but simply because it prevents the alternative. A new sub is rewarded for using the correct prescribed form of address for their dominant and others. They are punished for specific incorrect forms of address, such as use of legal names. And other forms of address used are ignored. Process for Implementing a Training Program. Observe, Collect Data, Document Do not trust your own memory or focus. If there is a behavior that you want to increase or decrease, you need to keep track of it at a base level. Make a Plan and Write it Down Plans can be adjusted, but if you do not have a one in a place where you can review it and make adjustments as necessary, chances are you will lose track and fail to follow through. Share the Plan with the Submissive At least some of it It is not necessary to tell the submissive everything. If they know the whole plan of when schedules will be adjusted, etc. However, at minimum, you want to tell them what behaviors are being targeted and in what way they will be published or rewarded. This will reduce confusion, anger, and resentment, as well as the amount of time that it takes for training to be effective. Nothing will make the training and likely your relationship fail faster than a submissive who knows they are being punished or rewarded but does not know why. If you divert from the plan and are inconsistent, those pattern recognition systems will draw conclusions and alter behavior accordingly. Observe, Collect Data, Document Keep close track of progress. And make sure you let the submissive know that progress is being made, especially if punishments are being used or if the process has been a particularly difficult struggle for them. Special rewards for meeting certain benchmarks are a great way to boost the effect of your training program. Adjust Often This is different than being inconsistent. You have to be responsive to what is actually happening. Plan time throughout the training process to evaluate the progress and general state of both you and the submissive. If you are making progress on the target behavior but your relationship is becoming too distant and cold, than it may not be worth it to continue, at least in the same manner that you are. Making adjustments is appropriate and necessary in almost every plan. When your observations indicate an adjustment is necessary, return to step. You have been unpredictable and untrustworthy. They may have a physical limitation that makes the alternate behavior not worth the reward. For instance, a bad knee can make a kneeling posture painful after a short amount of time, and a reward may not be enough to override that. The behavior is too complex or advanced to remember without constant reference. Putting an entire 30 page protocol manual into practice all at once is unlikely to be successful. Effective training focuses on a few behaviors at a time and expands or builds on those behaviors once they are consistently and confidently performed. Avoid increasing the work-to-reward ratio too quickly. Some submissives desire a challenge to their abilities. Failure to the adjust schedule to match their success has created a lack of contest. This problem can occur when working with two submissives at the same time, using the shorter of the two DRO time intervals. The submissive who could handle a longer time interval does not feel challenged. It is important to help the submissive display the appropriate behavior under changing circumstances e. If all of your training is done exclusively in private in your basement dungeon,. And if you search around, you will ind a lot of advice specific to each of these complicated situations. Are they more experienced than you are? Newer dominants can learn a lot from seasoned servants. Consider your history together. Are they new to you or have you been together for years? Do they have other partners? Polyamory and open relationships are very common in the kink community, but they add extra challenges. Do they have a sub of their own? If so, to what extent does your control over them extend to that relationship? Do they have another dominant? Are they in school? Do they have a job? If so, then they have another dominant. Take that into account. Do you switch? If they see you bottom to someone, will it effect their ability to submit to you? Do you switch with each other? That can make dynamics complicated. How much do their friends influence their behavior? Do they undermine the better behaviors you are trying to enable.? Another on the list is sexual services. I could keep going, but I think you have the idea. This is serious shit. Psychological conditioning will have a long term impact on people. On the one hand, as I said, people are doing it to each other every minute of every day. But when you engage in a program of targeted and intentional manipulation of this magnitude, you are taking on the full responsibility of their psychological well-being until the moment that one of you dies or until you put them back the way you found them. If you train them to cum only at the sound of your voice, then you are responsible for fixing that shit when you break up, or at least helping someone else do so. Because if you send them off on their own to try and have their next relationship and you have taken away their ability to experience pleasure, then you are the highest degree of asshole there is. Kink University — Online education from some of the best and well-known names in kink. Great for un-partnered submissives who wish to better themselves without a dominant. Vladimir Bekhterev, Ivan Pavlov. Alan E. Kazdin, Albert Bandura, Sidney W. Herrnstein, Clark L. Hull, Fred S. Keller, Neal E. Miller, Marsha M. Linehan, O. Osgood, Kenneth W. Spence, B. Tolman, Murray Sidman, John B. Greetings Sir, I would would love to read more of your thoughts on the conditioning aspect — as in the benefits of operant vs classical conditioning? Is there any one out there who nows what they are doing?! Has anyone actually been to Roissy? Not from here, obviously….. We have no idea what Roissy is. Our particular approach is that everyone in a power exchange dynamic is in service. One is not better or more deserving of respect or consideration than the other. And we believe that is the reason why most of us have been with our partners for years or decades while many Domly-Dom, High-Horse, Greater-Than-Thou types tend to have relationships for a few months at a time. If you disagree with me, by all means, write up your own views somewhere. But being a condescending asshole accomplishes nothing. Would you mind if I share your blog with my myspace group? Please let me know. Thanks for ones marvelous posting! I genuinely enjoyed reading it, you could be a great author. I will always bookmark your blog and definitely will come back from now on. I want to encourage you continue your great job, have a nice afternoon! I really appreciate this site it help me a lot. If you happen to know of anyone who dose submissive training please let me know. I am eagerly looking forward to learning more. We currently do not have anything scheduled for that area. You can email questions to xcbdsm gmail. Yes, there are a lot of typos here. The research here has been exhaustively done. And no one ever has to worry about their ability to orgasm being lost to any conditioning at all. Such things are contextual and the funny thing about humans? We can literally discard conditioning at will. What I really appreciate here is that there is no role essentialism bias. Because, while I fully accept that there really are actual Dominant humans among actual submissive humans, BDSM is apart from that biological reality and allows anyone regardless of actual type to engage in play that permits exploration of counter roles in a safe and potentially fulfilling way. The goal of the first and third is to reduce the frequency or probability of the target behavior. A broken toy. Maintenance is important. Other Dominants assist their submissives in losing weight through diet and exercise Domming. In addition to being another way for the Dominant to exercise control no pun intended, although it IS a great pun Some Dominants will put their submissives on strict diets, even spelling out the exact menu and requiring their submissives to weigh and measure all foods and track their intake in a food log. Financial domination, or FinDom, is a fetish in which one person most commonly a man gets gratification from transferring large sums to another person usually a woman. Allowing someone else to manage your finances is an act that takes a lot of trust because it opens a submissive up to potential financial abuse by an unscrupulous Dominant. Additionally, should their Dominant partner turn abusive a risk in any romantic relationship , lacking access to financial resources can make it that much more difficult to leave them. However, so long as the Dominant is more knowledgeable about money management and acts out of the best interest of the submissive, surrendering financial control can actually be very beneficial long term for the submissive if they struggle with those skills, especially if the Dominant teaches the submissive those skills so that they can eventually manage money on their own. Our voice is a big part of our identity and our autonomy. As a way of exercising control, some Doms employ speech restriction orders where a submissive isn't to speak until spoken to - or not even then, depending on the order. This speech restriction can be part of a kinky scene, of course, but can also extend outside of bedroom time to a couple's everyday existence. I knew a woman who had tried everything to stop biting her nails - sheer willpower, setting aside money for each day she resisted that she could spend on something fun. She even painted them with bitter-tasting varnish. Nothing worked. He ordered her to stop biting her nails and grow out claws to rake his back. Only then was she able to stop biting her nails. I've also seen submissives effectively kick cigarettes when their non-smoking Dominants order them not to smoke. Much like with diet and exercise-based orders, Dominants can serve as a source of accountability and help eliminate unwanted behaviors. This can take many forms. Kinkly Terms: Reproduction without explicit permission is prohibited. Toggle navigation Menu..

Easy stuff. Removing an averse click to see more Femdom shock submissive response to a desired behavior. Removing the chastity device for the evening if source correctly cook the meal Femdom shock submissive request.

This can result in either direct response training Whenever they here the annoying noise, they do a specific action to make it stop or in active avoidance, where they perform the desired behavior to avoid the Femdom shock submissive stimulus altogether. The next one, almost everyone gets wrong. It means making a bad feeling go away as a reward for good behavior. I gave Femdom shock submissive really overly simplistic example on the handout. They learn over time that when they start Femdom shock submissive smell the bad smell, they know how to make it go away.

If you are really good, they get Femdom shock submissive come off early. Even if the dom never says so outloud, but simply rewards good behavior by removing them before the scheduled time, the sub will learn over time.

If I am good all the time, not just Fridays, the Femdom shock submissive has learned, than I can avoid ever having to wear the nipple clamps. Providing an averse stimulus in response to an undesired behavior. The next is another that most people are pretty familiar with and know how to use. Positive punishment is a stimulus which discourages bad behavior. We are so lazy we set this one to auto-pilot with dogs now. The collars that spray citronella when the dog barks.

Or the invisible fence that gives them a little electric shock if they go past a certain point in the yard. Yeah, that kinda stuff works on people, too. There are even products made for it.

And basically the device Femdom shock submissive to stay horizontal or it shocks your genitals. Effective, I imagine, though I have not tried it myself.

Femdom shock submissive course, this can be done manually as well. And the advantage of humans is that we can talk so the learning is faster. So I can tell you, if you do X, I will do Y, rather than just doing it and hoping that you pick up on it. But with some stubborn type people, the subtle administration of rewards and punishments without explicit acknowledgement can be more effective.

Removing a positive stimulus in response to an undesired behavior. Finally, we have negative punishment. This one is pretty straight forward, too. No World of Warcraft for the rest of Femdom shock submissive week.

No orgasms Femdom shock submissive June. Something that you like is being taken away from you, as punishment for bad behavior.

Fun time over. Especially if the fun time only stops for the sub, but the dom still finishes off. Many interesting curse words can result from this. So, we should have that terminology straight now.

Positive is adding something and negative is taking something away. Does that make sense Femdom shock submissive everyone? Is that clear? Because nothing else will make much sense without it. Ok, moving forward. Unless you have a lot of free time, it is simply not possible to respond either positively or negatively to every single thing that a submissive does. Ratio Schedule: The reward or punishment occurs after a specific number of occurrences of the target behavior.

The first is a ratio. This means that when the reward or punishment is given out depends on the number of times that the target behavior occurs. Continuous means a 1: Every time the submissive Femdom shock submissive a particular thing, they Femdom shock submissive the response.

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If something is Femdom shock submissive high priority or if something is particularly new, this is probably the schedule you want, but as I said before, it will nearly impossible to maintain this for every single behavior you are targeting. So you have to reserve Femdom shock submissive schedule for special cases. A fixed ratio more info every 10 times or every 20 times you do the particular action, you will get a particular reward or punishment.

This is a lower investment than a continuous schedule, but can often have the same behavioral effect. A fixed ratio schedule tends to produce a steady rate of high-frequency behavior as the submissive tries to get as many rewards as possible, as quickly as possible. Games of chance are designed to reward you just Femdom shock submissive to keep you playing, but not too much that it becomes an expectation.

In the same way, police attempt to have the bare minimum traffic enforcement Femdom shock submissive make people choose to drive safer but without committing too many resources to it. The punishment or reward is administered every time the behavior occurs. Vending Machine. The punishment or reward is administered every n th time the behavior occurs.

Xxx Tusira Watch Video Seachvillage Video. Acts of Service Many Dominants order submissives to perform acts of service that make the Dominant's life easier. The possibilities are endless and can include: Register Now. Written by Page Turner. Page Turner is a relationship coach and social connector in the poly and kink communities. She is the head writer for Poly. Land , a website that publishes new content daily with an editorial focus on ethical non-monogamy, and the author of "Poly Land: My Brutally Honest Adventures in Polyamory. Full Bio. Related Articles. A Beginner's Guide to Submission. Dominance, Discipline and Abuse: Where to Draw the Line. What Kind of Submissive Are You? Power Play: Related Terms. What's the difference between a wood, leather or silicone spanking paddle? Can I still consider myself a feminist if I like a man to dominate me in bed? Is there some etiquette to attending a BDSM munch? More of your questions answered by our Experts. Kinkly Deals. Use Code: Related Tags. Or is that too self-serving? Your Comment. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email. Stage 1: I know better than this. This is so unlike me! I deserve worse than that. I fucked up and I know it hurt your feelings. Is there anything I can do to make it up to you? Case Study: October 13th, by Dumb Domme. Dumb Domme: Hedone says: June 28, at 2: Anonymous says: July 1, at 6: July 5, at Peroxide says: June 28, at 4: June 28, at 8: June 28, at 9: June 28, at June 29, at 4: Heather Cole says: June 30, at 9: July 1, at 3: July 31, at 5: July 31, at August 7, at August 7, at 8: November 12, at 5: November 12, at 6: November 13, at On a variable interval, the moments of judgment are not known to the submissive. You might say that their room will be inspected three times per week, but not tell them when. This can remove that scalloping effect and see a more consistent pattern of behavior. Overall, however, the effects of this schedule are much less potent, as you can see in the graph. This can be corrected by making the punishments and rewards greater. A set amount of time must pass before a reward or punishment will be administered after the previous reward or punishment. Free coffee with purchase, limit one per customer per day. An indeterminate amount of time passes between a reward or punishment being administered, which is still conditional on behavior. Checking email. Pop quizzes. Random drug tests. The approaches are positive in nature in that we find ways to use rewards to motivate the submissive to behave better instead of punishing them for their present ways, which may have been ingrained over a period of years or decades. While punishments can be combined with these procedures to create a more powerful change program, DR procedures are often used without punishment procedures accompanying them. Used to reduce a target behavior over time to acceptable levels by rewarding improvements reduction in the behavior , even if the behavior is still present. A submissive who normally smokes 12 cigarettes a day is rewarded for each day that they only smoke After a week or two, the number is reduced to 10, then 9, and so on until the behavior is eliminated. Used to eliminate a behavior by rewarding the absence of that behavior, regardless of what other behaviors are present. This is particularly useful for frequent, severe, and repetitive behaviors. Since rewards are given, even for different undesirable behavior, it should only be used for the elimination of high-priority problem behaviors. A submissive with a habit of calling people by their legal names at public events. The submissive is rewarded for each event where this does not happen, even if the other names they call them are not necessarily appropriate or polite. It will generally take a little while to see the initial benefit of this technique, but once it takes effect, the behavior will reduce drastically and quickly. Not because you the dom prefers that position, but simply because it prevents the alternative. A new sub is rewarded for using the correct prescribed form of address for their dominant and others. They are punished for specific incorrect forms of address, such as use of legal names. And other forms of address used are ignored. Process for Implementing a Training Program. Observe, Collect Data, Document Do not trust your own memory or focus. If there is a behavior that you want to increase or decrease, you need to keep track of it at a base level. Make a Plan and Write it Down Plans can be adjusted, but if you do not have a one in a place where you can review it and make adjustments as necessary, chances are you will lose track and fail to follow through. Share the Plan with the Submissive At least some of it It is not necessary to tell the submissive everything. If they know the whole plan of when schedules will be adjusted, etc. However, at minimum, you want to tell them what behaviors are being targeted and in what way they will be published or rewarded. This will reduce confusion, anger, and resentment, as well as the amount of time that it takes for training to be effective. Nothing will make the training and likely your relationship fail faster than a submissive who knows they are being punished or rewarded but does not know why. If you divert from the plan and are inconsistent, those pattern recognition systems will draw conclusions and alter behavior accordingly. Observe, Collect Data, Document Keep close track of progress. And make sure you let the submissive know that progress is being made, especially if punishments are being used or if the process has been a particularly difficult struggle for them. Special rewards for meeting certain benchmarks are a great way to boost the effect of your training program. Adjust Often This is different than being inconsistent. You have to be responsive to what is actually happening. Plan time throughout the training process to evaluate the progress and general state of both you and the submissive. If you are making progress on the target behavior but your relationship is becoming too distant and cold, than it may not be worth it to continue, at least in the same manner that you are. Making adjustments is appropriate and necessary in almost every plan. When your observations indicate an adjustment is necessary, return to step. You have been unpredictable and untrustworthy. They may have a physical limitation that makes the alternate behavior not worth the reward. For instance, a bad knee can make a kneeling posture painful after a short amount of time, and a reward may not be enough to override that. The behavior is too complex or advanced to remember without constant reference. Putting an entire 30 page protocol manual into practice all at once is unlikely to be successful. Effective training focuses on a few behaviors at a time and expands or builds on those behaviors once they are consistently and confidently performed. Avoid increasing the work-to-reward ratio too quickly. Some submissives desire a challenge to their abilities. Failure to the adjust schedule to match their success has created a lack of contest. This problem can occur when working with two submissives at the same time, using the shorter of the two DRO time intervals. The submissive who could handle a longer time interval does not feel challenged. It is important to help the submissive display the appropriate behavior under changing circumstances e. If all of your training is done exclusively in private in your basement dungeon,. And if you search around, you will ind a lot of advice specific to each of these complicated situations. Are they more experienced than you are? Newer dominants can learn a lot from seasoned servants. Consider your history together. Are they new to you or have you been together for years? Do they have other partners? Polyamory and open relationships are very common in the kink community, but they add extra challenges. Do they have a sub of their own? If so, to what extent does your control over them extend to that relationship? Do they have another dominant? Are they in school? Do they have a job? If so, then they have another dominant. Take that into account. Do you switch? If they see you bottom to someone, will it effect their ability to submit to you? Do you switch with each other? That can make dynamics complicated. How much do their friends influence their behavior? Do they undermine the better behaviors you are trying to enable.? Another on the list is sexual services. I could keep going, but I think you have the idea. This is serious shit. Psychological conditioning will have a long term impact on people. On the one hand, as I said, people are doing it to each other every minute of every day. But when you engage in a program of targeted and intentional manipulation of this magnitude, you are taking on the full responsibility of their psychological well-being until the moment that one of you dies or until you put them back the way you found them. If you train them to cum only at the sound of your voice, then you are responsible for fixing that shit when you break up, or at least helping someone else do so. Because if you send them off on their own to try and have their next relationship and you have taken away their ability to experience pleasure, then you are the highest degree of asshole there is. Kink University — Online education from some of the best and well-known names in kink. Great for un-partnered submissives who wish to better themselves without a dominant. Vladimir Bekhterev, Ivan Pavlov. Alan E. Kazdin, Albert Bandura, Sidney W. Herrnstein, Clark L. Hull, Fred S. Keller, Neal E. Miller, Marsha M. Linehan, O. Osgood, Kenneth W. Spence, B. Tolman, Murray Sidman, John B. Greetings Sir, I would would love to read more of your thoughts on the conditioning aspect — as in the benefits of operant vs classical conditioning? Is there any one out there who nows what they are doing?! Has anyone actually been to Roissy? Not from here, obviously….. We have no idea what Roissy is. Our particular approach is that everyone in a power exchange dynamic is in service. One is not better or more deserving of respect or consideration than the other. And we believe that is the reason why most of us have been with our partners for years or decades while many Domly-Dom, High-Horse, Greater-Than-Thou types tend to have relationships for a few months at a time. If you disagree with me, by all means, write up your own views somewhere. But being a condescending asshole accomplishes nothing. Would you mind if I share your blog with my myspace group? Please let me know. Thanks for ones marvelous posting! I genuinely enjoyed reading it, you could be a great author. I will always bookmark your blog and definitely will come back from now on. I want to encourage you continue your great job, have a nice afternoon! I really appreciate this site it help me a lot. If you happen to know of anyone who dose submissive training please let me know. I am eagerly looking forward to learning more. We currently do not have anything scheduled for that area. You can email questions to xcbdsm gmail. Yes, there are a lot of typos here. The research here has been exhaustively done. And no one ever has to worry about their ability to orgasm being lost to any conditioning at all. Such things are contextual and the funny thing about humans? We can literally discard conditioning at will. What I really appreciate here is that there is no role essentialism bias. Because, while I fully accept that there really are actual Dominant humans among actual submissive humans, BDSM is apart from that biological reality and allows anyone regardless of actual type to engage in play that permits exploration of counter roles in a safe and potentially fulfilling way. The goal of the first and third is to reduce the frequency or probability of the target behavior. The goal of the second is to increase the frequency or probability of the target behavior. They are polar opposites. And very importantly there is not always pain involved in punishment. For example, Denial of Orgasm does not usually involve pain, only frustration. Pain is certainly in that realm, but so is time out and caging and locking the sub down on a table for a few hours, accompanied by erotic touch and orgasm denial..

Car wash punch card. Your 10 th wash is free! The punishment or reward is administered, on average, every n th time the behavior occurs, but not always exactly on the n th occurrence. Slot machine. Interval Schedule: The reward or punishment has a maximum frequency but is still conditional on behavior. Now, Femdom shock submissive interval schedule, on the Femdom shock submissive hand, is time Femdom shock submissive, instead of frequency based.

With a fixed interval, judgment for the administration of a punishment or reward only happens every so often. A great example is Christmas time Femdom shock submissive kids. Those two weeks before Christmas is the best behavior you have ever seen. If the weeks leading up to Christmas are the best behavior you ever see, the days after Christmas are the worst. But over time, there is a net overall improvement Femdom shock submissive behavior.

On a variable interval, the moments of judgment are not known to the submissive. You might say that their room will be inspected three times per week, but not tell them when. This can remove that scalloping effect and source a more consistent pattern of behavior.

Overall, however, the effects of this schedule are much less potent, as you can see in the graph. This can be corrected by making the punishments and rewards greater. A set amount of time Femdom shock submissive pass before a reward or punishment will be administered after click previous reward or punishment.

Free coffee with purchase, limit one per customer per day. An indeterminate amount of time passes between a reward or punishment being administered, which is still conditional on behavior. Checking email. Pop quizzes. Random drug tests. The approaches are positive in Femdom shock submissive in that we find ways to use rewards to motivate the submissive to behave better instead of punishing them for their present ways, which may Femdom shock submissive been ingrained over a period of years or decades.

While punishments can be combined with these procedures to create a more powerful change program, DR procedures are often used Femdom shock submissive punishment procedures accompanying them. Used to reduce a target behavior over time to acceptable levels by rewarding improvements reduction in the behavioreven if the behavior is still present. A submissive who normally smokes 12 cigarettes a day is rewarded for each day that they only smoke After a week or two, the number is reduced to 10, then 9, and so on Femdom shock submissive the behavior is eliminated.

Used to eliminate Femdom shock submissive behavior by rewarding the absence of that behavior, regardless of what other behaviors are present.

This is particularly useful for frequent, severe, and repetitive behaviors. Since rewards are given, even for different undesirable behavior, it should only be used for the elimination of high-priority problem behaviors.

A submissive go here a habit of calling people by their legal names at public events.

The submissive is rewarded for each event where this does not happen, even if the other names they call them are not necessarily Femdom shock submissive or polite. Now, don't get me wrong - there are plenty of fun and naughty ways to order a submissive around in the bedroom. In fact, many long-term power exchange relationships involve a lot of nonsexual orders. Many Dominants order submissives to perform acts of service that make the Dominant's life easier.

The possibilities are endless and can include:. One submissive client Femdom shock submissive worked with had a ritual she performed that involved an intricate way of making the bed for her Dominant.

Every day as she went through those motions, her mind would drift to her Dom's face and how appreciative he'd later be of her efforts. Another submissive client said similar Femdom shock submissive his morning ritual of fixing his mistress's coffee just the way she liked it. Orders don't always need to be Femdom shock submissive for a Dominant's own selfish benefit. Instead, many Dominants give orders that promote their submissive's own self-improvement.

These could be small actions, such as reading a specific book to pick up a new skill or applying for a job the submissive might normally not have the confidence to try for on Femdom shock submissive own. The orders could be aimed towards a much larger goal as well. One submissive client I know was ordered by her Dominant to go continue reading to school to earn her bachelor's degree.

Moonlight Lady-shot Watch Video Xxx Rapmovie. Why would a Dominant give this kind of order? One Dom I know put it this way, "Yes, I'm in control, and I could take that control and use it to run my sub into the ground, but I'd rather build them up so they can be the best person they can be. Then what do you have? A broken toy. Maintenance is important. Other Dominants assist their submissives in losing weight through diet and exercise Domming. In addition to being another way for the Dominant to exercise control no pun intended, although it IS a great pun Some Dominants will put their submissives on strict diets, even spelling out the exact menu and requiring their submissives to weigh and measure all foods and track their intake in a food log. Financial domination, or FinDom, is a fetish in which one person most commonly a man gets gratification from transferring large sums to another person usually a woman. Allowing someone else to manage your finances is an act that takes a lot of trust because it opens a submissive up to potential financial abuse by an unscrupulous Dominant. Additionally, should their Dominant partner turn abusive a risk in any romantic relationship , lacking access to financial resources can make it that much more difficult to leave them. However, so long as the Dominant is more knowledgeable about money management and acts out of the best interest of the submissive, surrendering financial control can actually be very beneficial long term for the submissive if they struggle with those skills, especially if the Dominant teaches the submissive those skills so that they can eventually manage money on their own. Our voice is a big part of our identity and our autonomy. As a way of exercising control, some Doms employ speech restriction orders where a submissive isn't to speak until spoken to - or not even then, depending on the order. This speech restriction can be part of a kinky scene, of course, but can also extend outside of bedroom time to a couple's everyday existence. I knew a woman who had tried everything to stop biting her nails - sheer willpower, setting aside money for each day she resisted that she could spend on something fun. She even painted them with bitter-tasting varnish. Nothing worked. He ordered her to stop biting her nails and grow out claws to rake his back. Only then was she able to stop biting her nails. I've also seen submissives effectively kick cigarettes when their non-smoking Dominants order them not to smoke. Much like with diet and exercise-based orders, Dominants can serve as a source of accountability and help eliminate unwanted behaviors. This can take many forms. I deserve worse than that. I fucked up and I know it hurt your feelings. Is there anything I can do to make it up to you? Case Study: October 13th, by Dumb Domme. Dumb Domme: Hedone says: June 28, at 2: Anonymous says: July 1, at 6: July 5, at Peroxide says: June 28, at 4: June 28, at 8: June 28, at 9: June 28, at June 29, at 4: Heather Cole says: June 30, at 9: July 1, at 3: July 31, at 5: July 31, at August 7, at August 7, at 8: November 12, at 5: November 12, at 6: November 13, at November 13, at 9: Remi F. July 26, at 4: Dumb Domme says: July 26, at 6: HerKitten says: September 5, at 4: Ok, moving forward. Unless you have a lot of free time, it is simply not possible to respond either positively or negatively to every single thing that a submissive does. Ratio Schedule: The reward or punishment occurs after a specific number of occurrences of the target behavior. The first is a ratio. This means that when the reward or punishment is given out depends on the number of times that the target behavior occurs. Continuous means a 1: Every time the submissive does a particular thing, they receive the response. If something is a high priority or if something is particularly new, this is probably the schedule you want, but as I said before, it will nearly impossible to maintain this for every single behavior you are targeting. So you have to reserve this schedule for special cases. A fixed ratio says every 10 times or every 20 times you do the particular action, you will get a particular reward or punishment. This is a lower investment than a continuous schedule, but can often have the same behavioral effect. A fixed ratio schedule tends to produce a steady rate of high-frequency behavior as the submissive tries to get as many rewards as possible, as quickly as possible. Games of chance are designed to reward you just enough to keep you playing, but not too much that it becomes an expectation. In the same way, police attempt to have the bare minimum traffic enforcement to make people choose to drive safer but without committing too many resources to it. The punishment or reward is administered every time the behavior occurs. Vending Machine. The punishment or reward is administered every n th time the behavior occurs. Car wash punch card. Your 10 th wash is free! The punishment or reward is administered, on average, every n th time the behavior occurs, but not always exactly on the n th occurrence. Slot machine. Interval Schedule: The reward or punishment has a maximum frequency but is still conditional on behavior. Now, an interval schedule, on the other hand, is time based, instead of frequency based. With a fixed interval, judgment for the administration of a punishment or reward only happens every so often. A great example is Christmas time with kids. Those two weeks before Christmas is the best behavior you have ever seen. If the weeks leading up to Christmas are the best behavior you ever see, the days after Christmas are the worst. But over time, there is a net overall improvement in behavior. On a variable interval, the moments of judgment are not known to the submissive. You might say that their room will be inspected three times per week, but not tell them when. This can remove that scalloping effect and see a more consistent pattern of behavior. Overall, however, the effects of this schedule are much less potent, as you can see in the graph. This can be corrected by making the punishments and rewards greater. A set amount of time must pass before a reward or punishment will be administered after the previous reward or punishment. Free coffee with purchase, limit one per customer per day. An indeterminate amount of time passes between a reward or punishment being administered, which is still conditional on behavior. Checking email. Pop quizzes. Random drug tests. The approaches are positive in nature in that we find ways to use rewards to motivate the submissive to behave better instead of punishing them for their present ways, which may have been ingrained over a period of years or decades. While punishments can be combined with these procedures to create a more powerful change program, DR procedures are often used without punishment procedures accompanying them. Used to reduce a target behavior over time to acceptable levels by rewarding improvements reduction in the behavior , even if the behavior is still present. A submissive who normally smokes 12 cigarettes a day is rewarded for each day that they only smoke After a week or two, the number is reduced to 10, then 9, and so on until the behavior is eliminated. Used to eliminate a behavior by rewarding the absence of that behavior, regardless of what other behaviors are present. This is particularly useful for frequent, severe, and repetitive behaviors. Since rewards are given, even for different undesirable behavior, it should only be used for the elimination of high-priority problem behaviors. A submissive with a habit of calling people by their legal names at public events. The submissive is rewarded for each event where this does not happen, even if the other names they call them are not necessarily appropriate or polite. It will generally take a little while to see the initial benefit of this technique, but once it takes effect, the behavior will reduce drastically and quickly. Not because you the dom prefers that position, but simply because it prevents the alternative. A new sub is rewarded for using the correct prescribed form of address for their dominant and others. They are punished for specific incorrect forms of address, such as use of legal names. And other forms of address used are ignored. Process for Implementing a Training Program. Observe, Collect Data, Document Do not trust your own memory or focus. If there is a behavior that you want to increase or decrease, you need to keep track of it at a base level. Make a Plan and Write it Down Plans can be adjusted, but if you do not have a one in a place where you can review it and make adjustments as necessary, chances are you will lose track and fail to follow through. Share the Plan with the Submissive At least some of it It is not necessary to tell the submissive everything. If they know the whole plan of when schedules will be adjusted, etc. However, at minimum, you want to tell them what behaviors are being targeted and in what way they will be published or rewarded. This will reduce confusion, anger, and resentment, as well as the amount of time that it takes for training to be effective. Nothing will make the training and likely your relationship fail faster than a submissive who knows they are being punished or rewarded but does not know why. If you divert from the plan and are inconsistent, those pattern recognition systems will draw conclusions and alter behavior accordingly. Observe, Collect Data, Document Keep close track of progress. And make sure you let the submissive know that progress is being made, especially if punishments are being used or if the process has been a particularly difficult struggle for them. Special rewards for meeting certain benchmarks are a great way to boost the effect of your training program. Adjust Often This is different than being inconsistent. You have to be responsive to what is actually happening. Plan time throughout the training process to evaluate the progress and general state of both you and the submissive. If you are making progress on the target behavior but your relationship is becoming too distant and cold, than it may not be worth it to continue, at least in the same manner that you are. Making adjustments is appropriate and necessary in almost every plan. When your observations indicate an adjustment is necessary, return to step. You have been unpredictable and untrustworthy. They may have a physical limitation that makes the alternate behavior not worth the reward. For instance, a bad knee can make a kneeling posture painful after a short amount of time, and a reward may not be enough to override that. The behavior is too complex or advanced to remember without constant reference. Putting an entire 30 page protocol manual into practice all at once is unlikely to be successful. Effective training focuses on a few behaviors at a time and expands or builds on those behaviors once they are consistently and confidently performed. Avoid increasing the work-to-reward ratio too quickly. Some submissives desire a challenge to their abilities. Failure to the adjust schedule to match their success has created a lack of contest. This problem can occur when working with two submissives at the same time, using the shorter of the two DRO time intervals. The submissive who could handle a longer time interval does not feel challenged. It is important to help the submissive display the appropriate behavior under changing circumstances e. If all of your training is done exclusively in private in your basement dungeon,. And if you search around, you will ind a lot of advice specific to each of these complicated situations. Are they more experienced than you are? Newer dominants can learn a lot from seasoned servants. Consider your history together. Are they new to you or have you been together for years? Do they have other partners? Polyamory and open relationships are very common in the kink community, but they add extra challenges. Do they have a sub of their own? If so, to what extent does your control over them extend to that relationship? Do they have another dominant? Are they in school? Do they have a job? If so, then they have another dominant. Take that into account. Do you switch? If they see you bottom to someone, will it effect their ability to submit to you? Do you switch with each other? That can make dynamics complicated. How much do their friends influence their behavior? Do they undermine the better behaviors you are trying to enable.? Another on the list is sexual services. I could keep going, but I think you have the idea. This is serious shit. Psychological conditioning will have a long term impact on people. On the one hand, as I said, people are doing it to each other every minute of every day. But when you engage in a program of targeted and intentional manipulation of this magnitude, you are taking on the full responsibility of their psychological well-being until the moment that one of you dies or until you put them back the way you found them. If you train them to cum only at the sound of your voice, then you are responsible for fixing that shit when you break up, or at least helping someone else do so. Because if you send them off on their own to try and have their next relationship and you have taken away their ability to experience pleasure, then you are the highest degree of asshole there is. Kink University — Online education from some of the best and well-known names in kink. Great for un-partnered submissives who wish to better themselves without a dominant. Vladimir Bekhterev, Ivan Pavlov. Alan E. Kazdin, Albert Bandura, Sidney W. Herrnstein, Clark L. Hull, Fred S. Keller, Neal E. Miller, Marsha M. Linehan, O. Osgood, Kenneth W. Spence, B. Tolman, Murray Sidman, John B. Greetings Sir, I would would love to read more of your thoughts on the conditioning aspect — as in the benefits of operant vs classical conditioning? Is there any one out there who nows what they are doing?! Has anyone actually been to Roissy? Not from here, obviously…...

Yes, almost everyone wears underwear everyday. But these panties are seriously different. Sign up to win a Femdom shock submissive in Femdom shock submissive - or your lover's - size. In both cases, these submissives longed to make those life changes but Femdom shock submissive like they couldn't because of impostor syndrome.

The Dominant's order gave them the confidence to do it. Why would a Dominant give this kind of order? One Dom I know put it this way, "Yes, Femdom shock submissive in control, and I could take that control and use it to run my sub into the ground, but I'd rather build them up so they can be the best person they can be.

Then what do you have? A broken article source. Maintenance is important. Other Dominants assist their submissives in losing weight through diet and exercise Domming. Chinese self defense using thumbs only. While most people think of sex when they think of BDSM, dominance and submission, stripped to their most basic level, link primarily about the voluntary exchange of power and control.

Now, don't get me wrong - there are plenty of fun Femdom shock submissive naughty ways to order a submissive around in the bedroom. In fact, many long-term power exchange relationships involve a lot of nonsexual orders. Many Dominants order submissives to perform acts Femdom shock submissive service that make the Dominant's life easier.

The possibilities are endless and can include:. One submissive client I worked with had a ritual she performed that involved an intricate way of making the bed for her Dominant. Every day as she went through those motions, her mind would drift to her Dom's face and how appreciative he'd later be of her efforts.

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Another submissive client said similar of his morning ritual of fixing his mistress's coffee Femdom shock submissive the way she liked it. Orders don't always need to be directly for a Dominant's own selfish benefit. Instead, many Dominants give orders that promote their submissive's own self-improvement. These could be small actions, such as reading a specific book to pick up a new skill or applying for a job the submissive might normally Femdom shock submissive have the confidence to try for on their own.

The orders could be aimed towards a much larger goal as well. One submissive client I know was ordered by her Dominant to go back to school to earn Femdom shock submissive bachelor's degree. Yes, almost everyone wears underwear everyday.

Femdom shock submissive

But these panties are seriously different. Sign up to win a pair in your - or your lover's - size. In both cases, Femdom shock submissive submissives longed to make those life changes but felt like they couldn't because of impostor syndrome. The Dominant's order gave them the confidence to do it. Why would a Dominant give this kind of order? One Dom I know put it this way, "Yes, I'm in control, and I could take that control and use it to run my sub into the ground, but I'd rather build them up so they can be the best person they can be.

Then what do you Femdom shock submissive A broken toy. Maintenance is important. Other Dominants assist their submissives in losing weight through diet and Femdom shock submissive Domming. In addition to being another way for the Dominant to exercise control no pun intended, although it IS a great Femdom shock submissive Some Dominants will put their submissives on strict diets, even spelling out the exact menu and read more their submissives to weigh and measure all foods and track their intake in a food log.

Financial domination, or FinDom, is a fetish in which one person most commonly a man gets gratification from transferring large sums to another person usually a woman. Allowing someone else to manage your finances is an act that takes a lot of trust Femdom shock submissive it opens a submissive up to potential financial abuse by an unscrupulous Dominant.

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Femdom shock submissive Additionally, should their Dominant partner turn abusive a risk in any romantic relationshiplacking access to financial resources can make it that much more difficult to leave them. However, so long as the Dominant is more knowledgeable about money management and acts out of the Femdom shock submissive interest of the submissive, surrendering financial control can actually be very beneficial long term for the submissive if they struggle with those skills, especially if the Dominant teaches the submissive those skills so that they can eventually manage money on their own.

Our voice is a big part of our identity and our autonomy. As a way of exercising control, some Doms employ speech restriction orders where Femdom shock submissive submissive isn't to speak Femdom shock submissive spoken to - or not even then, depending on the order.

This speech restriction can be part of a kinky scene, of course, but can also extend outside of bedroom time to a couple's everyday existence. I knew a woman who had tried everything to stop biting her nails - sheer willpower, setting aside money for each day she resisted that she could spend on something fun. She even painted them with bitter-tasting varnish. Nothing worked. He ordered her to stop biting her nails and grow out Femdom shock submissive to rake his back.

Nudu sex Watch Video femdom photo. While most people think of sex when they think of BDSM, dominance and submission, stripped to their most basic level, are primarily about the voluntary exchange of power and control. Now, don't get me wrong - there are plenty of fun and naughty ways to order a submissive around in the bedroom. In fact, many long-term power exchange relationships involve a lot of nonsexual orders. Many Dominants order submissives to perform acts of service that make the Dominant's life easier. The possibilities are endless and can include:. One submissive client I worked with had a ritual she performed that involved an intricate way of making the bed for her Dominant. Every day as she went through those motions, her mind would drift to her Dom's face and how appreciative he'd later be of her efforts. Another submissive client said similar of his morning ritual of fixing his mistress's coffee just the way she liked it. Orders don't always need to be directly for a Dominant's own selfish benefit. Instead, many Dominants give orders that promote their submissive's own self-improvement. These could be small actions, such as reading a specific book to pick up a new skill or applying for a job the submissive might normally not have the confidence to try for on their own. The orders could be aimed towards a much larger goal as well. One submissive client I know was ordered by her Dominant to go back to school to earn her bachelor's degree. Yes, almost everyone wears underwear everyday. But these panties are seriously different. Sign up to win a pair in your - or your lover's - size. In both cases, these submissives longed to make those life changes but felt like they couldn't because of impostor syndrome. The Dominant's order gave them the confidence to do it. Why would a Dominant give this kind of order? One Dom I know put it this way, "Yes, I'm in control, and I could take that control and use it to run my sub into the ground, but I'd rather build them up so they can be the best person they can be. Then what do you have? A broken toy. Maintenance is important. But stages three and four seem preposterous to me, like putting out a house fire with your valuables. I really like your thoughts about shock—I think sometimes the hypothetical submissive does forget he prefers being owned. Actually, the events that loosely inspired this were more like putting out a votive candle with your valuables. A truly fascinating field study if ever there was one. I think the Domme the hypothetical Domme, of course! Perhaps she was unwilling or unable to punish. If she takes option 1 or 2 and continues to be disappointed, then she is to blame. Perhaps it is the submissive who is failing. After open exchange with the submissive has taken place, an understanding of what is to be expected is reached, and the behavior continues, it is then time to reevaluate the relationship. That the Domme was unable to make a grown adult choose to uphold his part in the relationship can hardly be laid at her feet as a failure. Because I will take a cane to those fingers. That question is now my gut-check question. Did I make an honest mistake? Did I interpret something he said incorrectly? Thank you for writing this. Dominant bitches LOVE the shift key. I like this! I guess I should change my ways! Congratulations—both on 15 years of marriage and on 1 year in submission to your Princess! I think most of us sub, dom or otherwise often fuck up apologies. Despite the stages probably registering on my face I tend to just admit my guilt, say I am sorry, do what I can to fix the issue, and try to briefly point out that I will endeavor not to make the mistake again. Different people communicate very differently, and it can take time to find a good approach. I can imagine 15 years of marriage might help! Lol yes and that was a big shock to me in our first year of marriage. Mine still flips into newbie-melodramatic-sub mode on occasion, but when that happens, now I just think of this and laugh he hates that! If an apology is good, a bigger apology is better. If kneeling is good, prostrating oneself is better. All that said, I know this article was meant to be light-hearted, sarcastic, funny and silly. I know my relationship is more touchy-feely than most, and I may just be going all bleeding-heart, but I figured it was still worth saying. It is a joy to read, really, so thank you for giving the Internet a little view into an intimate piece of your life. Thank you so much for the comment! But it came from a real response to the way my submissive handled himself when he made a mistake. His response felt self-centered and selfish to me. We talked about it, of course, but after I noticed patterns, I was angry enough to rant about it in writing I was so angry I never posted it in its original form , and that rant evolved into this satire is it satire? Somebody does something you want them to do, you give em a cookie. With the right person, a smile can be cookie enough. After that when you all responded, I said cool or awesome or great. And over time, more and more responded. Easy stuff. Removing an averse stimulus in response to a desired behavior. Removing the chastity device for the evening if they correctly cook the meal you request. This can result in either direct response training Whenever they here the annoying noise, they do a specific action to make it stop or in active avoidance, where they perform the desired behavior to avoid the negative stimulus altogether. The next one, almost everyone gets wrong. It means making a bad feeling go away as a reward for good behavior. I gave a really overly simplistic example on the handout. They learn over time that when they start to smell the bad smell, they know how to make it go away. If you are really good, they get to come off early. Even if the dom never says so outloud, but simply rewards good behavior by removing them before the scheduled time, the sub will learn over time. If I am good all the time, not just Fridays, the sub has learned, than I can avoid ever having to wear the nipple clamps. Providing an averse stimulus in response to an undesired behavior. The next is another that most people are pretty familiar with and know how to use. Positive punishment is a stimulus which discourages bad behavior. We are so lazy we set this one to auto-pilot with dogs now. The collars that spray citronella when the dog barks. Or the invisible fence that gives them a little electric shock if they go past a certain point in the yard. Yeah, that kinda stuff works on people, too. There are even products made for it. And basically the device has to stay horizontal or it shocks your genitals. Effective, I imagine, though I have not tried it myself. Of course, this can be done manually as well. And the advantage of humans is that we can talk so the learning is faster. So I can tell you, if you do X, I will do Y, rather than just doing it and hoping that you pick up on it. But with some stubborn type people, the subtle administration of rewards and punishments without explicit acknowledgement can be more effective. Removing a positive stimulus in response to an undesired behavior. Finally, we have negative punishment. This one is pretty straight forward, too. No World of Warcraft for the rest of the week. No orgasms til June. Something that you like is being taken away from you, as punishment for bad behavior. Fun time over. Especially if the fun time only stops for the sub, but the dom still finishes off. Many interesting curse words can result from this. So, we should have that terminology straight now. Positive is adding something and negative is taking something away. Does that make sense to everyone? Is that clear? Because nothing else will make much sense without it. Ok, moving forward. Unless you have a lot of free time, it is simply not possible to respond either positively or negatively to every single thing that a submissive does. Ratio Schedule: The reward or punishment occurs after a specific number of occurrences of the target behavior. The first is a ratio. This means that when the reward or punishment is given out depends on the number of times that the target behavior occurs. Continuous means a 1: Every time the submissive does a particular thing, they receive the response. If something is a high priority or if something is particularly new, this is probably the schedule you want, but as I said before, it will nearly impossible to maintain this for every single behavior you are targeting. So you have to reserve this schedule for special cases. A fixed ratio says every 10 times or every 20 times you do the particular action, you will get a particular reward or punishment. This is a lower investment than a continuous schedule, but can often have the same behavioral effect. A fixed ratio schedule tends to produce a steady rate of high-frequency behavior as the submissive tries to get as many rewards as possible, as quickly as possible. Games of chance are designed to reward you just enough to keep you playing, but not too much that it becomes an expectation. In the same way, police attempt to have the bare minimum traffic enforcement to make people choose to drive safer but without committing too many resources to it. The punishment or reward is administered every time the behavior occurs. Vending Machine. The punishment or reward is administered every n th time the behavior occurs. Car wash punch card. Your 10 th wash is free! The punishment or reward is administered, on average, every n th time the behavior occurs, but not always exactly on the n th occurrence. Slot machine. Interval Schedule: The reward or punishment has a maximum frequency but is still conditional on behavior. Now, an interval schedule, on the other hand, is time based, instead of frequency based. With a fixed interval, judgment for the administration of a punishment or reward only happens every so often. A great example is Christmas time with kids. Those two weeks before Christmas is the best behavior you have ever seen. If the weeks leading up to Christmas are the best behavior you ever see, the days after Christmas are the worst. But over time, there is a net overall improvement in behavior. On a variable interval, the moments of judgment are not known to the submissive. You might say that their room will be inspected three times per week, but not tell them when. This can remove that scalloping effect and see a more consistent pattern of behavior. Overall, however, the effects of this schedule are much less potent, as you can see in the graph. This can be corrected by making the punishments and rewards greater. A set amount of time must pass before a reward or punishment will be administered after the previous reward or punishment. Free coffee with purchase, limit one per customer per day. An indeterminate amount of time passes between a reward or punishment being administered, which is still conditional on behavior. Checking email. Pop quizzes. Random drug tests. The approaches are positive in nature in that we find ways to use rewards to motivate the submissive to behave better instead of punishing them for their present ways, which may have been ingrained over a period of years or decades. While punishments can be combined with these procedures to create a more powerful change program, DR procedures are often used without punishment procedures accompanying them. Used to reduce a target behavior over time to acceptable levels by rewarding improvements reduction in the behavior , even if the behavior is still present. A submissive who normally smokes 12 cigarettes a day is rewarded for each day that they only smoke After a week or two, the number is reduced to 10, then 9, and so on until the behavior is eliminated. Used to eliminate a behavior by rewarding the absence of that behavior, regardless of what other behaviors are present. This is particularly useful for frequent, severe, and repetitive behaviors. Since rewards are given, even for different undesirable behavior, it should only be used for the elimination of high-priority problem behaviors. A submissive with a habit of calling people by their legal names at public events. The submissive is rewarded for each event where this does not happen, even if the other names they call them are not necessarily appropriate or polite. It will generally take a little while to see the initial benefit of this technique, but once it takes effect, the behavior will reduce drastically and quickly. Not because you the dom prefers that position, but simply because it prevents the alternative. A new sub is rewarded for using the correct prescribed form of address for their dominant and others. They are punished for specific incorrect forms of address, such as use of legal names. And other forms of address used are ignored. Process for Implementing a Training Program. Observe, Collect Data, Document Do not trust your own memory or focus. If there is a behavior that you want to increase or decrease, you need to keep track of it at a base level. Make a Plan and Write it Down Plans can be adjusted, but if you do not have a one in a place where you can review it and make adjustments as necessary, chances are you will lose track and fail to follow through. Share the Plan with the Submissive At least some of it It is not necessary to tell the submissive everything. If they know the whole plan of when schedules will be adjusted, etc. However, at minimum, you want to tell them what behaviors are being targeted and in what way they will be published or rewarded. This will reduce confusion, anger, and resentment, as well as the amount of time that it takes for training to be effective. Nothing will make the training and likely your relationship fail faster than a submissive who knows they are being punished or rewarded but does not know why. If you divert from the plan and are inconsistent, those pattern recognition systems will draw conclusions and alter behavior accordingly. Observe, Collect Data, Document Keep close track of progress. And make sure you let the submissive know that progress is being made, especially if punishments are being used or if the process has been a particularly difficult struggle for them. Special rewards for meeting certain benchmarks are a great way to boost the effect of your training program. Adjust Often This is different than being inconsistent. You have to be responsive to what is actually happening. Plan time throughout the training process to evaluate the progress and general state of both you and the submissive. If you are making progress on the target behavior but your relationship is becoming too distant and cold, than it may not be worth it to continue, at least in the same manner that you are. Making adjustments is appropriate and necessary in almost every plan. When your observations indicate an adjustment is necessary, return to step. You have been unpredictable and untrustworthy. They may have a physical limitation that makes the alternate behavior not worth the reward. For instance, a bad knee can make a kneeling posture painful after a short amount of time, and a reward may not be enough to override that. The behavior is too complex or advanced to remember without constant reference. Putting an entire 30 page protocol manual into practice all at once is unlikely to be successful. Effective training focuses on a few behaviors at a time and expands or builds on those behaviors once they are consistently and confidently performed. Avoid increasing the work-to-reward ratio too quickly. Some submissives desire a challenge to their abilities. Failure to the adjust schedule to match their success has created a lack of contest. This problem can occur when working with two submissives at the same time, using the shorter of the two DRO time intervals. The submissive who could handle a longer time interval does not feel challenged. It is important to help the submissive display the appropriate behavior under changing circumstances e. If all of your training is done exclusively in private in your basement dungeon,. And if you search around, you will ind a lot of advice specific to each of these complicated situations. Are they more experienced than you are?.

Femdom shock submissive Only then was she able to stop biting her nails. I've also seen submissives effectively kick cigarettes when their non-smoking Dominants order them not to smoke. Much like with diet and exercise-based orders, Dominants can serve as a source of Femdom shock submissive and help eliminate unwanted behaviors. This can take many forms. Kinkly Terms: Reproduction without explicit permission is prohibited.

Toggle navigation Menu. Page Turner October 12, Here are 6 orders for submissives that don't Femdom shock submissive around sex. Acts of Service Many Dominants order submissives to perform acts of service that make the Dominant's life easier.

Kitchen Xxxxx Watch Video Porn video1. I see stage two as being a semi subconscious attempt to mitigate the consequences they are about to encounter. But stages three and four seem preposterous to me, like putting out a house fire with your valuables. I really like your thoughts about shock—I think sometimes the hypothetical submissive does forget he prefers being owned. Actually, the events that loosely inspired this were more like putting out a votive candle with your valuables. A truly fascinating field study if ever there was one. I think the Domme the hypothetical Domme, of course! Perhaps she was unwilling or unable to punish. If she takes option 1 or 2 and continues to be disappointed, then she is to blame. Perhaps it is the submissive who is failing. After open exchange with the submissive has taken place, an understanding of what is to be expected is reached, and the behavior continues, it is then time to reevaluate the relationship. That the Domme was unable to make a grown adult choose to uphold his part in the relationship can hardly be laid at her feet as a failure. Because I will take a cane to those fingers. That question is now my gut-check question. Did I make an honest mistake? Did I interpret something he said incorrectly? Thank you for writing this. Dominant bitches LOVE the shift key. I like this! I guess I should change my ways! Congratulations—both on 15 years of marriage and on 1 year in submission to your Princess! I think most of us sub, dom or otherwise often fuck up apologies. Despite the stages probably registering on my face I tend to just admit my guilt, say I am sorry, do what I can to fix the issue, and try to briefly point out that I will endeavor not to make the mistake again. Different people communicate very differently, and it can take time to find a good approach. I can imagine 15 years of marriage might help! Lol yes and that was a big shock to me in our first year of marriage. Mine still flips into newbie-melodramatic-sub mode on occasion, but when that happens, now I just think of this and laugh he hates that! If an apology is good, a bigger apology is better. If kneeling is good, prostrating oneself is better. All that said, I know this article was meant to be light-hearted, sarcastic, funny and silly. I know my relationship is more touchy-feely than most, and I may just be going all bleeding-heart, but I figured it was still worth saying. It is a joy to read, really, so thank you for giving the Internet a little view into an intimate piece of your life. Thank you so much for the comment! But it came from a real response to the way my submissive handled himself when he made a mistake. His response felt self-centered and selfish to me. Free coffee with purchase, limit one per customer per day. An indeterminate amount of time passes between a reward or punishment being administered, which is still conditional on behavior. Checking email. Pop quizzes. Random drug tests. The approaches are positive in nature in that we find ways to use rewards to motivate the submissive to behave better instead of punishing them for their present ways, which may have been ingrained over a period of years or decades. While punishments can be combined with these procedures to create a more powerful change program, DR procedures are often used without punishment procedures accompanying them. Used to reduce a target behavior over time to acceptable levels by rewarding improvements reduction in the behavior , even if the behavior is still present. A submissive who normally smokes 12 cigarettes a day is rewarded for each day that they only smoke After a week or two, the number is reduced to 10, then 9, and so on until the behavior is eliminated. Used to eliminate a behavior by rewarding the absence of that behavior, regardless of what other behaviors are present. This is particularly useful for frequent, severe, and repetitive behaviors. Since rewards are given, even for different undesirable behavior, it should only be used for the elimination of high-priority problem behaviors. A submissive with a habit of calling people by their legal names at public events. The submissive is rewarded for each event where this does not happen, even if the other names they call them are not necessarily appropriate or polite. It will generally take a little while to see the initial benefit of this technique, but once it takes effect, the behavior will reduce drastically and quickly. Not because you the dom prefers that position, but simply because it prevents the alternative. A new sub is rewarded for using the correct prescribed form of address for their dominant and others. They are punished for specific incorrect forms of address, such as use of legal names. And other forms of address used are ignored. Process for Implementing a Training Program. Observe, Collect Data, Document Do not trust your own memory or focus. If there is a behavior that you want to increase or decrease, you need to keep track of it at a base level. Make a Plan and Write it Down Plans can be adjusted, but if you do not have a one in a place where you can review it and make adjustments as necessary, chances are you will lose track and fail to follow through. Share the Plan with the Submissive At least some of it It is not necessary to tell the submissive everything. If they know the whole plan of when schedules will be adjusted, etc. However, at minimum, you want to tell them what behaviors are being targeted and in what way they will be published or rewarded. This will reduce confusion, anger, and resentment, as well as the amount of time that it takes for training to be effective. Nothing will make the training and likely your relationship fail faster than a submissive who knows they are being punished or rewarded but does not know why. If you divert from the plan and are inconsistent, those pattern recognition systems will draw conclusions and alter behavior accordingly. Observe, Collect Data, Document Keep close track of progress. And make sure you let the submissive know that progress is being made, especially if punishments are being used or if the process has been a particularly difficult struggle for them. Special rewards for meeting certain benchmarks are a great way to boost the effect of your training program. Adjust Often This is different than being inconsistent. You have to be responsive to what is actually happening. Plan time throughout the training process to evaluate the progress and general state of both you and the submissive. If you are making progress on the target behavior but your relationship is becoming too distant and cold, than it may not be worth it to continue, at least in the same manner that you are. Making adjustments is appropriate and necessary in almost every plan. When your observations indicate an adjustment is necessary, return to step. You have been unpredictable and untrustworthy. They may have a physical limitation that makes the alternate behavior not worth the reward. For instance, a bad knee can make a kneeling posture painful after a short amount of time, and a reward may not be enough to override that. The behavior is too complex or advanced to remember without constant reference. Putting an entire 30 page protocol manual into practice all at once is unlikely to be successful. Effective training focuses on a few behaviors at a time and expands or builds on those behaviors once they are consistently and confidently performed. Avoid increasing the work-to-reward ratio too quickly. Some submissives desire a challenge to their abilities. Failure to the adjust schedule to match their success has created a lack of contest. This problem can occur when working with two submissives at the same time, using the shorter of the two DRO time intervals. The submissive who could handle a longer time interval does not feel challenged. It is important to help the submissive display the appropriate behavior under changing circumstances e. If all of your training is done exclusively in private in your basement dungeon,. And if you search around, you will ind a lot of advice specific to each of these complicated situations. Are they more experienced than you are? Newer dominants can learn a lot from seasoned servants. Consider your history together. Are they new to you or have you been together for years? Do they have other partners? Polyamory and open relationships are very common in the kink community, but they add extra challenges. Do they have a sub of their own? If so, to what extent does your control over them extend to that relationship? Do they have another dominant? Are they in school? Do they have a job? If so, then they have another dominant. Take that into account. Do you switch? If they see you bottom to someone, will it effect their ability to submit to you? Do you switch with each other? That can make dynamics complicated. How much do their friends influence their behavior? Do they undermine the better behaviors you are trying to enable.? Another on the list is sexual services. I could keep going, but I think you have the idea. This is serious shit. Psychological conditioning will have a long term impact on people. On the one hand, as I said, people are doing it to each other every minute of every day. But when you engage in a program of targeted and intentional manipulation of this magnitude, you are taking on the full responsibility of their psychological well-being until the moment that one of you dies or until you put them back the way you found them. If you train them to cum only at the sound of your voice, then you are responsible for fixing that shit when you break up, or at least helping someone else do so. Because if you send them off on their own to try and have their next relationship and you have taken away their ability to experience pleasure, then you are the highest degree of asshole there is. Kink University — Online education from some of the best and well-known names in kink. Great for un-partnered submissives who wish to better themselves without a dominant. Vladimir Bekhterev, Ivan Pavlov. Alan E. Kazdin, Albert Bandura, Sidney W. Herrnstein, Clark L. Hull, Fred S. Keller, Neal E. Miller, Marsha M. Linehan, O. Osgood, Kenneth W. Spence, B. Tolman, Murray Sidman, John B. Greetings Sir, I would would love to read more of your thoughts on the conditioning aspect — as in the benefits of operant vs classical conditioning? Is there any one out there who nows what they are doing?! Has anyone actually been to Roissy? Not from here, obviously….. We have no idea what Roissy is. Our particular approach is that everyone in a power exchange dynamic is in service. One is not better or more deserving of respect or consideration than the other. And we believe that is the reason why most of us have been with our partners for years or decades while many Domly-Dom, High-Horse, Greater-Than-Thou types tend to have relationships for a few months at a time. If you disagree with me, by all means, write up your own views somewhere. But being a condescending asshole accomplishes nothing. Would you mind if I share your blog with my myspace group? Please let me know. Thanks for ones marvelous posting! I genuinely enjoyed reading it, you could be a great author. I will always bookmark your blog and definitely will come back from now on. I want to encourage you continue your great job, have a nice afternoon! I really appreciate this site it help me a lot. If you happen to know of anyone who dose submissive training please let me know. I am eagerly looking forward to learning more. We currently do not have anything scheduled for that area. You can email questions to xcbdsm gmail. Yes, there are a lot of typos here. The research here has been exhaustively done. And no one ever has to worry about their ability to orgasm being lost to any conditioning at all. Such things are contextual and the funny thing about humans? We can literally discard conditioning at will. What I really appreciate here is that there is no role essentialism bias. Because, while I fully accept that there really are actual Dominant humans among actual submissive humans, BDSM is apart from that biological reality and allows anyone regardless of actual type to engage in play that permits exploration of counter roles in a safe and potentially fulfilling way. The goal of the first and third is to reduce the frequency or probability of the target behavior. The goal of the second is to increase the frequency or probability of the target behavior. They are polar opposites. And very importantly there is not always pain involved in punishment. For example, Denial of Orgasm does not usually involve pain, only frustration. Pain is certainly in that realm, but so is time out and caging and locking the sub down on a table for a few hours, accompanied by erotic touch and orgasm denial. Well done. You are commenting using your WordPress. You are commenting using your Google account. You are commenting using your Twitter account. You are commenting using your Facebook account. Notify me of new comments via email. Every day as she went through those motions, her mind would drift to her Dom's face and how appreciative he'd later be of her efforts. Another submissive client said similar of his morning ritual of fixing his mistress's coffee just the way she liked it. Orders don't always need to be directly for a Dominant's own selfish benefit. Instead, many Dominants give orders that promote their submissive's own self-improvement. These could be small actions, such as reading a specific book to pick up a new skill or applying for a job the submissive might normally not have the confidence to try for on their own. The orders could be aimed towards a much larger goal as well. One submissive client I know was ordered by her Dominant to go back to school to earn her bachelor's degree. Yes, almost everyone wears underwear everyday. But these panties are seriously different. Sign up to win a pair in your - or your lover's - size. In both cases, these submissives longed to make those life changes but felt like they couldn't because of impostor syndrome. The Dominant's order gave them the confidence to do it. Why would a Dominant give this kind of order? One Dom I know put it this way, "Yes, I'm in control, and I could take that control and use it to run my sub into the ground, but I'd rather build them up so they can be the best person they can be. Then what do you have? A broken toy. Maintenance is important. Other Dominants assist their submissives in losing weight through diet and exercise Domming. In addition to being another way for the Dominant to exercise control no pun intended, although it IS a great pun Some Dominants will put their submissives on strict diets, even spelling out the exact menu and requiring their submissives to weigh and measure all foods and track their intake in a food log. Financial domination, or FinDom, is a fetish in which one person most commonly a man gets gratification from transferring large sums to another person usually a woman. Allowing someone else to manage your finances is an act that takes a lot of trust because it opens a submissive up to potential financial abuse by an unscrupulous Dominant. Additionally, should their Dominant partner turn abusive a risk in any romantic relationship , lacking access to financial resources can make it that much more difficult to leave them..

The possibilities are endless and can include: Here Now. Written by Page Turner. Page Turner is a relationship coach and social connector in the poly and kink communities. She is the head writer for Poly. Landa website that publishes new content daily with an editorial focus on ethical Femdom shock submissive, and the author of "Poly Land: My Brutally Honest Adventures in Polyamory.

Full Bio. Related Articles. A Beginner's Guide to Submission. Dominance, Discipline and Abuse: Where to Draw the Line. What Kind of Submissive Are You?

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Age Verification
The content accessible from this site contains pornography and is intended for adults only.
Age Verification
The content accessible from this site contains pornography and is intended for adults only.
Age Verification
The content accessible from this site contains pornography and is intended for adults only.
Age Verification
The content accessible from this site contains pornography and is intended for adults only.